IC Contact: Mask or Menace

[helladoomed]

Yo this is Chloe. Screening my calls because hella busy and don't got time for you. Leave somethin' and I'll hit you back when I feel like it.

Comments

[helladoomed]

Yeah. I get that. Figured I'd give you a little time before I started hounding.

Uh. Batman? Man I don't know. Last year?

[timecapture]

We should hang out on the weekend! I mean, if you're free. And you want to.

Oh, great. Because... you know, he's here. In this city.

[She's honestly trying not to fangirl.]

[helladoomed]

No Max, I totally don't want to hang out with you.

[Maximum sarcasm. And then...]

Wait what?

[timecapture]

Aw. [Cue giggles.]

Yep. Batman. Totally cereal about this.

[helladoomed]

Yup. Sorry. No girlfriend for you.

[Man.]

Okay that is hella weird.

[timecapture]

Oh, boo. Guess I've got to write shitty poetry and take angsty selfies now.

Yyyyyep. And I really need you to not tell anyone that you know who he is.

[helladoomed]

So, normal Wednesday then?

[Sorry she can't help it.]

Huh. Right. Secret identity.

[A beat.]

Hmmmmm.

[timecapture]

Hey!

[Oh, dear. She knows that tone.]

Chloe.

[helladoomed]

I'm just thinkin', he's...you know. Filthy, unimaginably, unrealistically rich...

His secret is probably worth a few bucks to him at least...

[timecapture]

Chloe, don't you dare.

[He's Batman. Surely, she can see why that's such a bad idea, even if her morals are rusty.]

[helladoomed]

I'm just sayin'...

[She huffs.]

Fine, fine. But being rich would be pretty nice you know.

[timecapture]

And I'm just saying, it's not the right thing to do. Besides, remember that scene where Morgan Freeman tells that one asshole "good luck" when he wants to blackmail Christian Bale? Yeah.

[helladoomed]

That never made sense to me. Like, Batman doesn't kill people. Everybody knows that.

What was he gonna do?

[timecapture]

Beat the shit out of the guy, for one.

[helladoomed]

Yeah...maybe.

But he can't exactly do that here. I mean, unless he wants to show up on the network beating up a girl.

[timecapture]

I'm pretty sure Batman's punched girls. I mean, girls can be criminals, too.